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A Dramatic Apology


Curt Cloninger
Click Here to see my website


A Dramatic Apology

Scene:   An auto repair shop

Characters:    Peter Merriam  (a wise man of few words, and the best auto mechanic in suburban Atlanta)
Curt Cloninger  (an actor and writer.   A man with a Subaru, and a need for some encouragement)
[The scene opens with Peter finishing up an oil change on Curt’s old Subaru.   As is his custom, Curt engages his friend in conversation.]

Curt:     So …how’s business?  
Peter:   Not bad.  
Curt:   That’s saying something, in this economy.  
Peter:   Yeah, well …  
Curt:   I mean, really … fixing cars … I guess that’s sort of a recession-proof thing, huh?  
Peter:  I guess.  
Curt:    [somewhat wistfully]   Maybe I should learn how to fix cars …
Peter:   Nah.   You should stick with what you’re good at.  
Curt:   Which is?  
Peter:   You know … Acting.   And writing.   And stuff about God.  
Curt:    [somewhat discouraged]   Yeah well … in this economy, that’s not exactly fixing cars.  
Peter:    [putting down his wrench]   What do you mean?      
Curt:    [leaning against his Subaru]   It seems like,   in times like these … you know … tight times, it’s guys like you who people need.   Guys who can do practical things, like fix old cars.     These days I’m not sure how many people are looking for actors playing the Fool for God.  
Peter:    [Wiping his hands on an old rag.   Stops and looks directly at Curt]   You really are an idiot, aren’t you?  
Curt:    [with a slight chuckle]   It’s good to know you still have the gift of encouragement.  
Peter:    [not laughing]   I’m serious.   What you do is much more important than fixing an old car.   You’re giving people hope.   You’re helping ‘em laugh.   You’re pointing ‘em in the direction of what’s real and true and lasting.   And you’re entertaining ‘em to boot.  [after a pause]   Didn’t you learn anything in those fancy schools that you went to?  
Curt:    [chastised]   Maybe.  
Peter:     I’m gonna tell you something.   If you quit traveling, doing your shows about God, I’m not gonna work on your car anymore.
Curt:   Hey!   That’s not fair!  
Peter:   I’m just saying.  
Curt:   Well, that’s not exactly up to me.   For an actor to act he’s gotta have an audience.   People actually need to schedule me for their events.  
Peter:   They will.   You’ll see.    [as he puts his tools away]   Hey … Maybe you need to cut ‘em a bit of slack on your fees.   Everybody’s doing that these days … you know … lowering their prices a bit.      
Curt:   So, I’m getting this oil change at a discount?  
Peter:   Don’t hold your breath.

Peter is a Wise Man
I do hope my friend Peter is right. For twenty-five years I’ve made my living doing something as “impractical”as bringing people hope, laughter and reflection about what’s lasting in this life. I’d love to keep doing that, especially in these tough times, when people really need those things. Drop me a note. Pass my name on to others. I’m probably more affordable than you realize.   And, after all, I’ve got an oil change to pay for.

  New Show: “Return on Investment”

Arthur Knocks, Financial Advisor, is retiring. Join him at his retirement party as he and several of his past clients tell their stories about what they have (and haven’t) learned about money.  
This new show looks really promising. It’s funny. It’s instructive. It hits the heart and the mind. I’ve already performed it for the National Christian Foundation, and soon will perform it for a national conference of the Christian Stewardship Network. Do people you know need a bit of encouragement about money? Let Arthur be your guy! He’s a professional!

  Open dates in 2009

Many dates open for the year, even on short notice (when I can be especially flexible on honorarium).    
Specific dates open in these areas:  


Curt Cloninger
Click Here to see my website

Pass my name on to others!   I’ll bring ‘em a quart of oil.